The illusion of personal importance and the challenge of living together
Every human being experiences the world from a unique position. Each person is the central observer of their own life. Their thoughts, feelings, memories, desires, and concerns form a world that is deeply personal and immediately real to them.
This creates a natural illusion. Because everything is experienced through one’s own consciousness, a person may begin to feel that they are more important than others. Yet the same thing is happening in the minds of billions of other people. Each considers their own life important, often without fully appreciating that others are experiencing their lives with similar intensity.
Human beings therefore share one physical world while living in countless psychological worlds. The same event may bring happiness to one person and sadness to another. The same situation may appear fair to one and unfair to another. Their experiences differ because their thoughts, beliefs, memories, and expectations differ.
These individual worlds are not isolated. They continuously interact through families, friendships, workplaces, communities, and societies.
And this is where a problem emerges.
When people come together, each brings their own priorities, interpretations, and expectations. If everyone insists that their personal perspective should prevail, cooperation becomes difficult. Disagreement may turn into conflict, and individual freedom may threaten collective discipline.
For a group to function effectively, its members must recognise something fundamental: although everyone is the centre of their own experience, nobody is automatically the centre of the group.
This recognition makes mutual respect, shared rules, responsibility, and discipline necessary. A person must sometimes accept that what seems best from their own perspective may not be best for everyone.
But another difficulty remains. Who can determine what is truly best for the whole?
Imagine a universal observer capable of understanding every individual’s experiences, needs, intentions, and circumstances simultaneously. Such an observer could consider the entire picture rather than judging everything from one person’s limited perspective.
From that comprehensive position, a decision might appear reasonable and fair. Yet an individual, unable to see everything the observer sees, might experience the same decision as restrictive, unfair, or even oppressive.
The individual may feel misunderstood, even when their circumstances have been fully considered.
However, this creates an important distinction. A hypothetical universal observer may possess complete understanding, but no ordinary human authority can claim such knowledge with certainty. Human decisions must therefore remain open to questioning, explanation, and correction.
This brings the individual to an important realisation.
Their personal world deserves attention, care, and protection. They are responsible for their choices and well-being. But their world cannot be their only concern. Other people also have lives that matter, and individual actions can influence those lives.
Ultimately, three perspectives become important: the individual’s own perspective, the perspectives of others, and the possibility of a universal perspective encompassing everyone.
Human maturity may involve learning to consider all three.
A person does not need to surrender their individuality or deny their own importance. They simply need to recognise that their experience is one among countless equally real human experiences.
Perhaps the greatest illusion is not that people consider themselves important, but that they mistake their personal importance for universal importance.
And perhaps wisdom begins when a person understands that they are the centre of their own world, but only one part of a much greater existence.
